Time-Life Presents: Songs for Insomniacs
Those who know me know that I don’t sleep. It’s too relaxing and I like being a tense and nervous freak. Okay, I don’t like it, it’s just the natural bi-product of not sleeping.
I have had this problem on and off since, hmmmm, 2000. Some people have told me I should see a sleep specialist at one of those sleep clinic thingees. Or at least go to my regular doctor and let him dope me up. I can’t do that. Cold day in Hell when I start popping pills just to do something everybody else can do. What’s next? Take pills just to poop.
As a sleep deprived individual, I’ve developed certain late night activities that can be performed without causing too much of a rukus. I’ve seen every single one of those informercials for music collections. I am really starting to like that classic Soul ballad collection promoted by Peabo Bryson. My favourite part of those infomercials, other than the music clips of course, is the testimonials from people. The person’s name flashes at the bottom of the screen as if these are people with some sort of public personna. I never quite understood why the informercials have this. I am all for Peabo Bryson saying things like “This is the greatest collection of Soul music I’ve ever heard.” He was a Soul musician. But all these other people are just people. What do they know?
Anybody remember that classic Rock collection advertised by Roger Daultrey? Can you say career low points? I knew you could.
When I watch those informercials, I like to count how many of the songs I actually have. Every informercial has got that line in their somewhere: “It could cost thousands of dollars to get these songs seperately.” They were right you know. But now, with iTunes and other similar music download services, it only costs .99 a song. These informercials work well as advertisements for iTunes. I’ll hear a 5 second sound clip and the next thing I do is go to iTunes to pick up If You Don’t Know Me By Now.
This morning, I caught the Classic Soft Rock collection. This infomercial was hosted by the guys from Air Supply. This collection has a lot of great ’70s tunes. It really made me want to break out my old Chicago records. There was this really funny part. One of the Air Supply guys says “Remember this record. Everybody bought this record.” It was Frampton Comes Alive. This is funny for two reasons: 1) if everybody already has it, why would somebody buy a collection with songs they already have; and 2) I just got that record (not CD, vinyl LP) for Christmas.
I’m convinced Stand by Me by Ben E. King is on every one of these collections.
Recommended Listening: Bargain by The Who
January 31, 2007 at 1:32 pm
I too have struggled with insomnia all my life. There’s a post about it on my blog. TV, infomercials and Roger Daultry would tick me off too much to fall asleep. My wife watches the “shopping shows” which should, but doesn’t bring on sleep either. Songs by William Shatner would induce either horror or giggling. Hope you find a way to sleep without pills.
January 31, 2007 at 3:01 pm
Man i have offered you some movies to put you to sleep. I know how you hate my movie collection I am sure we can find some that will help.
January 31, 2007 at 6:01 pm
“As a sleep deprived individual, I’ve developed certain late night activities that can be performed without causing too much of a rukus”
*snicker* You can only imagine what popped into my mind after reading that statement, and it had nothing to do with informercials.
January 31, 2007 at 9:00 pm
You have old Chicago records?
Steve~
February 1, 2007 at 1:12 am
Bob - I’ve got movies, you know that. What do I need more for?
Miss Ash - You wish.
Steven - I’m not gonna buy there new stuff.
February 1, 2007 at 12:57 pm
things you can do without too much of a rukus… have you seen the girls gone wild infomercials?
February 2, 2007 at 2:59 pm
but my movies suck and they would put you to sleep. Your movie collection is good and would keep you on the edge of your seat!