Life With Carmine

Apparently, Juice has updated the Life With Carmine blog. I’ve been too lazy to post anything up there. The last time I tried I couldn’t log in. Stupid Blogspot.

I’ve got one little Carmine story right now, so here it is.

Carmine Goes Shopping For China

After dinner, Carmine was looking at this magazine that was on the table. It was the television guide that comes with the Saturday Star in Toronto. Torontonians know this mag. On the back cover is usually an ad for china (the plates and bowls, not the country). Carmine saw this ad and began to regail us with the tale of when he and his wife went to the annual Ashley warehouse sale to buy some new dishes.

The Ashley warehouse sale is supposed to be this huge affair where people will line up for hours just get some good deals on china. I figure, what’s the big deal, it’s just a plate and a bowl right? Well, Carmine apparently feels the same way.

Carmine looked around and saw this plate design that he liked. Carmine being the type of person he is, said “Hmmm, I like that set. I’ll take that set with these cups and saucers and this and that. The base set is only $950 anyways. Looks like a good deal.”

The woman working the register rings everything up and tells Carmine the total, “That will be $15,000 please.”

First things first, Carmine misread the price tag; the base set was $9,500.00 but Carmine, not realizing that was a bit surprised.

Carmine, thinking that its just a bunch of plates and stuff and not willing to blow 15 grand on plates but still holding one of the plates said “15 grand for a bunch of stupid plates you can’t even put in the dishwasher. Forget this!” After saying that, Carmine threw the plate in the air…

… but he never let go of the plate. The saleswoman gasped for air as she saw the plate rise in Carmine’s hand as Carmine swiftly shot his hand into the air. The woman was left grasping her chest and panting for air.

“What’s the big deal? It’s jussa stupid plate.”

Recommended Listening: Kitchenware and Candy Bars by Stone Temple Pilots.