Best & Worst Cars

Inspired by an article I read in the Toronto Star, this is a list of the best and worst cars (in my opinion) I’ve ever driven.

Now, obviously, I’ve driven many fewers cars than the Toronto Star’s Jim Kenzie, so my list won’t be as long or as extensive, but it will be as opinionated.

2003 Hummer H2

I didn’t drive it much, but I didn’t need to drive it much; I didn’t want to drive it much. The thing was a beast. It was huge and hard to maneuver. The only place around the car with any sort of visibility was ahead in the distance. Somebody could be walking directly in front of the vehicle and the driver would never know. The mirrors offered no help in parking beside structures or backing up in anyway.

This was the first vehicle I’ve ever seen hit the $100 mark when refuelling and that was years ago when gas was much cheaper than it is today.

My favourite reason to hate this car is something that hasn’t anything to do with mileage, speed, handling, but more to do with the sloppy nature in which this car was built. When trying to enter the car on one occasion, I gripped the door handle with my hand and pulled, as I would with any car door. Instead of the door opening, the handle simply came off in my hand. Unfortunately, behaviour such as that was common with this car. The heating/cooling vents in the car popped off everytime I tried to alter their direction, the powerseats fuse blew on a regular basis and the back door sensor was permanently sensing the back door to be open, even though it wasn’t. Most cars simply have a light that tells the driver the back door is open, not this car, it had an annoying beeping sound. Try taking a roadtrip with that sound continously beeping.

1996 Volvo 850R

I was only granted the opportunity to drive this car a couple of times as it was a privalege to drive this car. This was my mother’s car. That being said meant that my mother was in the car with me while driving. Not that she was teaching me to drive (my brother was); my mother instead was in the backseat screaming for her life. “Oh my God! I’m gonna die! Aaaaahhhh!”

Regardless of the hysterical woman in the backseat, this was one comfy ride. Just sitting in the car with my hands on the steering wheel, I felt like I was driving the right car for me. Then I tapped the gas pedal. My head shot back into the headrest. That was par for the course with that car. For a boxy car (really, what Volvo wasn’t boxy), this car had some get-up-and-go. It drove smoothly, was built for speed and comfort and it had this little device I’ve never seen any car before or since. There was this button next to the transmission. It was a toggle switch that read “ECON/SPORT” and my mother always left it on ECON. But, when put into SPORT, I swear the car was a plane without wings. This baby flew.

The handling was nice, the braking was very responsive and it really felt like a much smaller car although it was quite the behemoth.

2002 Honda Odyssey

It’s big, it’s ugly, it’s unconformatable and it moves like molasses in January. I didn’t touch the thing until it had a whole heap of kilometres on it (got it very used). I immediately took to beating the crap out of the thing. But everytime I laid a beating on that ugly beast, it just smiled and said “Thank you sir, may I have another.” The one time I brought it in for service, it actually came back in worse shape. (Never using that mechanic again.)

One side door sticks, the other side door is broken so that it can be only opened from inside. What’s the deal with Hondas and shitty handles? My brother’s Civic has some weird issues with the door handles too. The daytime running lights module is messed up too. So, basically, all the little things go wrong on this vehicle, but the engine, assumming I didn’t leave the lights on all night, the engine starts each and every morning.

The traction control system is also pretty useful. Without that, it’s like driving a boat, slips in the rain and doesn’t move in the snow.

Sure, there’s plenty of reasons to not like the Odyssey, but the sheer fact that it never gives up on me makes it a pretty special car. Lights can be replaced, rear passenger doors can be avoided and the TCS has an easy-to-use on/off button, but the engine and the transmission, so far so good.

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What’s been your best and worst car?